29 July 2008

Review of The X-Files: I Want to Believe (2008)

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DVD Release Date: 2 December 2008 (click date to purchase or pre-order)


• "X-Files" fanatics.
• "X-Files" fans who've been longing to see Mulder and Sculley under covers.
• "X-Files" fans who've missed the cool signature theme song by Mark Snow so much that they find themselves going "Dewt-Déwt-Dewt-Déwt-Déwt-Dew-Dew" anytime anything remotely eerie happens to them. Followed by a "Bah-Báh-Bah-Báh-Báh-Bah-Bah" and "Déét-Déet-Deét-Deet-Deet-DEET-DEE".
• People hoping for a Skinner (Mitch Pileggi) cameo.
• "X-Files" fans who've gone so long without hearing Sculley say "Mul-der" and Mulder say "Scul-ley" they've also actually forgotten the characters do have first names respectively Dana and Fox. And any good "X-Files" conspiracy theorist will tell you that naming him Fox was the fledgling networks way of plugging its name 50,000 times an episode.
• People duped into buying "The X-Files: Revelations—an essential guide to the X-Files Movie" DVD. This set of 8 self-proclaimed "critical episodes handpicked by the creator" to prepare you for the film if it's been too long since you've seen an episode of the "X-Files". You may as well use the Movie Money inside to subsidize your ticket to the tune of a max of $8.50 (better see the matinee if you want to make out ahead on this deal).

• People who do not think sensationalizing and making jokes about unsettling abuse charges and convictions against Catholic Priests is entertainment.
• "X-Files" fans who prefer the alien-government-conspiracy-theory-style shows.
• People who didn't care for the lower budget horror film, Turistas.
• People hoping for a Lone Gunmen or Smoking man cameo.
• People duped into buying "The X-Files: Revelations—an essential guide to the X-Files Movie" DVD. This set of 8 self-proclaimed "critical episodes handpicked by the creator" to prepare you for the film if it's been too long since you've seen an episode of the "X-Files". Unfortunately, you would realize after seeing the film, how much better the show was than either of the movies, but especially this movie. Plus, it's a heck of a lot more fun to see the crazy hair styles of the stars and the Smoking Man back in the very first, pilot episode (air date 10 September 1993 – apologies if that makes you feel ancient) of the "X-Files" which is included in this set of 8 excellent episodes.
• Fans of Amanda Peet, Billy Connolly, and/or Xzibit (aka Alvin Joiner). Why? Here are their character names respectively which probably explains it all: ASAC Dakota Whitney, Father Joseph Crissman, and seriously Agent Mosley Drummy. Maybe if you put these names in a Sodoku box and advance each letter once for every time Sculley throws up her arms in angst over Mulder's irresponsibility in the film, they spell out the T-H-E-T-R-U-T-H-I-S-Y-O-U-G-O-T-R-O-B-B-E-D. "Déét-Déet-Deét-Deet-Deet-DEET-DEE".

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